If I could do it again...
Updated: Jan 5
I’m relatively new to the mom gig. Some days I rock. Some days I am ok. Some days I screw the whole thing up but every single day I learn something. Every single day I get better from my mistakes. Before I became a mother I honestly thought moms had all their s*** together…HA. I quickly realized that actually nobody has their s*** together. IN FACT, we lose our s*** multiple times a day.
I kind of felt lied to by society. I felt like a lot of moms sweep under the rug the hard stuff. They paint on a face that life is great and motherhood is easy. I think this happens because we, as moms, wear so many hats. As I entered motherhood and realized that this is hard as crap I kind of felt like a failure. So, I took to the internet. I read blogs, instagrams, various Facebook posts until I found the REAL. I wanted to read something that made me feel normal for not loving the stage I was in. I wanted to always remember that so that I could connect with moms and be real with them. To help them. To empathize with them. To say, hey sister—I get it. I felt obsessed with the idea of banding moms together and forming relationships to inspire, encourage, and guide one another.
I had so much I wanted to tell new moms. I wanted them to know they’re not alone. I wanted them to know about this overwhelming, crazy, funny, sweet, and lovely ride that is truly motherhood. But what do I say? What would I do different? I had a few ideas but I wanted to know what other moms had to say. So, what do you do to get information? You ask Facebook of course.
I made a post to Facebook and asked a simple question: If you could go back to being a new mom and tell yourself ONE THING, what would it be? I had 42 replies from mothers from all walks of life. Some were stay at home moms. Some were working mamas. Some were moms of 1, some were moms of 3+. Some were married. Some were single. But they all had the same title: MOM. They were from various walks of life but all had one connecting factor which was trying to figure out how the heck to best mother their kids.
I broke them down into categories and tallied them up. Here is the TOP 5 things that moms said they would go back and tell themselves as a new mom. These top 5 responses don’t just stop at the newborn phase but are great reminders to us mamas through all seasons of parenting. Hopefully this will help the new mama who feels alone or the seasonsed mama dealing with a strong-willed teeanager.
LET THEM BE LITTLE!!!!!
The number 1 overwhelming response was LET THEM BE LITTLE. These mamas said this in various ways but at the end of the day the moms said to hold those babies, rock them, cuddle them, sing to them, pick them up and let them be just who they are in this present moment. Don’t rush this stage. And also, just for the record-know that holding a baby DOES NOT spoil them. Whew that felt good to say.
Don’t wish away them becoming independent. Enjoy the sleeplessness, enjoy the dozens of bottle feeds, enjoy the changing of the diapers because the verdict from moms who have raised their children say, “You will WANT this back”.